One Isolating Gaze
by Celeste-poet
Summary: Slight AU:Mimi wasn't found at the end of RENT.4 months after she disappeared,Roger discovers Mimi prostituted herself for drugs--& can't escape from the man who now owns her.Roger vows to set her free,& fall in love with her all over again.Roger's POV
1. Chapter 1 Mimi At First Sight?

The story is told from Roger's POV.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

It had been four months since Mimi disappeared.

I was long past the stage of being worried. If she wanted to screw up her life, fine. But there was not much more I could do for her.

Even so, I couldn't help but feel like something was missing from my life.

I finally had landed a job at the Life Café, and aside from being the busboy, I was allowed to play once per week, on Wednesday nights. It wasn't a bad gig, and I played a lot of my old stuff, but one song… "Your Eyes," seemed to be everyone's favorite. I didn't want to play it a lot at first, but I had this silly dream that one day Mimi would walk in and hear what I had written for her.

Mark was still at Buzzline, despite his declaration to quit. Some things never change…

And some things do.

It was Wednesday night, my night to try and shine. There were a few regulars who had come just to hear me play, and there were others with unfamiliar faces who were just trying to enjoy their dinner. I bused tables for a few hours until 7 o'clock when James, the manager, signaled me to go on the stage. With hidden excitement, I made my way over to my guitar.

I also had a drummer and a keyboard player as backup. The drummer, Patrick, wasn't bad, though I wished Angel could drum for me. She would put any other drummer to shame. The keyboard player, Josh, was actually from my old band. Once he had heard I had gotten a permanent gig, he asked to join up with me in the middle of the week.

So there we were, a small trio in the middle of New York City, feeling important for just one night.

We began to play "Night Life," a steady rock ballad, and I noticed a girl with a small frame and brown hair make her way over to the bar. I could have sworn it looked like Mimi. The distraction, however, made me hit the wrong note, earning me a distasteful look from some of the patrons. I shook my head and focused on my music.

After we finished the song (and a small applause congratulated us), the girl whom I had noticed earlier looked over. She had the same face and same smile as Mimi, but her eyes looked different. They weren't scared or in pain; they were mocking, as if to say she knew she was hot. She flashed this look to several different guys in the restaurant, and a few of them raised their eyebrows and stared. She was dressed in high-heel black boots, with a black miniskirt and a spaghetti strap black top.

If I didn't know better, I would have said she looked like a hooker.

Patrick drummed impatiently, waiting for me to start the next song. Taking his hint, I started the next song, "What You Own." Mark had helped with that song, though I had changed the parts about Angel and Mimi in it. With her, though, sitting in my audience that night, I wanted to mention her so badly. It didn't seem to matter that she had left with no trace and dropped out of my life like a falling star. She was here, she was real, and she was alive. The virus hadn't killed her—yet.

_I don't own emotion…I rent…_

_What was it about that night?_

Upon those words, Mimi's eyes found the stage. She looked surprised, knowing I recognized her and she recognized me. I was singing my heart out straight to her.

_Conviction…in an isolating gaze…_

She blinked, and then turned to the bartender, I suppose, to ask for another shot. She turned around, refilled, and started paying more attention to the little show on stage than the other guys in the restaurant.

After the song ended, it was time for a break. Patrick went outside to smoke a cigarette, and James went to the bar for a drink. I followed him, intending to talk with Mimi. As soon as she saw me headed her way, though, she looked a little frightened and headed for the door. I tried to follow her, but lost her as soon as she left.

I could just feel the strings of my heart pulling a little tighter.


	2. Chapter 2 Wouldn't We All Like to Forget

"I'm telling you, Mark, I saw her!" I declared.

Mark shook his blonde head. 'I still think it's a figment of your imagination. Or even a ghost. Mimi…that just doesn't sound like our Mimi."

We sat quietly in the darkness of our pad (the lights had been shut off again because Mark had forgotten to pay the light bill the day before). I felt dismayed and disappointed; as soon as I got off my shift at the Life Café, I had run all the way home to tell Mark. Now I felt even worse than before, thanks to a doubting Mark.

Why had Mimi run away from me?

My beeper sounded, reminding me I needed my daily dose of reality. I was almost used to living with AIDS by now. There were whole days where I wouldn't even give a thought to how I ended up with the disease in the first place.

But every day I thought of Mimi.

I thought I was mad at her for leaving me, but I suppose the truth was that I was mad at myself for leaving her. A heart full of regret makes seeing these things difficult.

It was all my fault.

Mark studied me carefully. "Are you going to take your AZT or what?"

"Yeah, yeah, I am," I said begrudgingly, and I headed to the kitchen for the meds and a glass of water. Mark seemed particularly grouchy tonight. "You okay, Mark?"

Mark clenched his fists. "Does it _look_ like I'm okay?"

Holy shit. "I'm sorry, what's wrong?"

Mark sighed. "I just…I saw a girl who looked like Mimi today, too. Except she was dead. Buzzline covered the whole story, blood, guts, and all."

My heart froze. "But…"

"But it wasn't her. Could have passed for a sister, though. I'm just a little testy about it. I didn't feel like filming that dead girl, but they held my job against me. Told me either I film her, or I stop filming, period."

"Wow." No wonder he was ticked.

"Yeah, I know," Mark said, leaning his head back against our couch. "I just…realized how much I cared about Mimi." He looked at me quickly.

I blinked several times. After registering this little-known fact in my mind, I took another sip of water. "Really? You liked Mimi?" I asked, trying to sound polite.

Mark sighed, "Look, I know she was your girlfriend and all, but I didn't see anything wrong with just thinking about her. Mimi was a very unique girl—and I miss her mainly because you were a happier guy around her…the happiest I had seen you since…" His voice trailed off.

I knew what he meant thought—since April's funeral. It didn't hurt to think of her anymore, because now Mimi was my new pain.

"Why won't you believe me, though?" I questioned him.

"Because," he remarked, "it would mean allowing her memory to resurface and hurt you. It's better to leave it alone."

That made sense. Sort of. I finished the water and hunted for the vodka—I needed some serious stoning after all this.

I drank, praying I would forget Mimi's name by the morning.

***************************************************************************************************************

I woke up on the couch, with my pants halfway down and Mimi laying beside me. "Mimi? Where have you been?"

She turned her head to look at me and she smiled. "Why, I've been here all along, Roger."

****************************************************************************************************************

Then I really woke up. My pants were halfway down, and I was lying next to the toilet. "Ugh…" I muttered, struggling to get up and only succeeding in hurting myself by knocking my head against the bathroom sink. "Damnit!"

"Roger? You okay in there?" I could hear Mark call.

"Fine…just frikkin' fine." Shoot. I had only been dreaming. I had to be…Mimi and I had never had sex. Yet. She couldn't afford birth control, I kept forgetting condoms, and we sure as hell didn't want to bring a sick child with AIDS into this world. We liked to think we had more of an emotional relationship than a sexual one.

I shook my head and got up to leave the bathroom. Going into the kitchen, I asked Mark, "What happened last night?"

"You drank. Again. If it's not one thing or another…you've always got an addiction," scolded Mark.

"Oh, shut up." The last thing I needed was a lecture. Bad enough the drinking didn't make me forget her. I dreamt of her. I never remember my dreams, usually.

Knock, knock. Mark headed over to the door and slid it open. Collins came in, with more vodka and something that looked suspiciously like weed. "Hey, man, you gotta get me a key of my own," Collins said as he came in and set his stuff on the coffee table.

There was a time when he used to ask. Now Collins can just look at me and tell—Mimi hasn't returned. Today was a little different thought—even he could tell. He looked like he was about to ask when Mark cut him off and talked to him about where to get a key made.

Mark didn't want to talk about it, but I did. I wanted to believe in a little miracle.


	3. Chapter 3 Your Eyes

I had tried to forget her, but I knew she would appear again.

Wednesday night came around again, and I was singing my heart to a crowd that could probably care less about my efforts. They just wanted to hear some music.

In the middle of my little guitar jam, I looked at the bar. There she was again, smile as dazzling as ever. She looked fabulous in a denim miniskirt, pink boots, large pink hoop earrings, and a loose pink top. My heart melted at the sight of her. My Mimi…

When the rock song was over, I decided to play another one. Motioning to the guys that I was going to play solo and they would have to improve later, I began singing to her the words I should have said so long ago.

_Your eyes_

_As we said our goodbyes_

_Can't get them out of my mind_

_And I find_

_I can't hide_

_From your eyes,_

_The ones that took me by surprise,_

_The night you came into my life._

_Where there's moonlight,_

_I see your eyes._

_How'd I let you slip away_

_When I'm longing so to hold you?_

_Now I die, for one more day_

'_Cause there's something I should have told you._

_Yes, there's something I should have told you_

_When I looked into your eyes._

_Why does distance make us wise?_

_You were the song all along_

_And before the song dies…_

_I should tell you,_

_I should tell you—_

_I have always loved you._

_You can see it in my eyes._

A little guitar strumming, the drums kicked in, and a nice finale.

Mimi sat there with her eyes wide open, mouthing "For me?"

I nodded. She looked down, apparently thinking.

Another nice surprise was the audience. They seemed to actually enjoy it—which was a nice touch, considering I wasn't playing for them at all.

I was playing for her, and Mimi knew it.


	4. Chapter 4 Mimi's Story

_A/N: Italics are when they are singing. The exchange of "I should tell you", of course, is familiar—and Mimi's solo about her story is to the tune of "No Day But Today". It's difficult to project that, though, when writing._

******************************************************************************************************************

Mimi ended up staying the entire night at the Life Café, once I had gotten her attention. When my band stopped playing at eleven o'clock, I immediately went over to see Mimi. She didn't run away this time. Climbing onto the barstool next to her, I asked the bartender for my usual drink. He came back with vodka on the rocks.

"So," I said, trying to sound casual, "how have you been? We…I missed you."

She batted her long, lovely eyelashes. "I've been doing great, actually."

Not exactly the answer I wanted to hear, but at least I knew she was alive instead of dead on the streets thanks to drugs. I wanted more answers, though. "Why did you leave?"

"I could ask you the same thing."

Touché. "It wasn't because I didn't—"

"I know," she interrupted. "You loved me. And you should have known Benny was nothing compared to—"

"I know."

"_I should tell you_—"

"_No, I should tell you_—"

"No, I really should tell you where I've been," Mimi stated. She took a deep breath. "I'm not on drugs anymore—I quit that just a little while ago. But the addiction before I quit was driving me mad.

_See, I was all alone_

_Wishing for you_

_But when we said goodbye, love,_

_All I knew_

_Was the high._

_If I couldn't have you,_

_Then what was the reason_

_I was still living_

_During every season?_

_I lived for today,_

_Because there was no other way._

_I had no choices—_

_I had no hope._

_I found one way_

_That I could cope…_

You see, the drugs were my release. I would do anything for a fix.

"A guy named Max came up to me with drugs and offered them to me if I did him a small favor. I didn't care what the favor was, I snatched up the drugs and started shooting up. As soon as I was high, Max took me to his place and forced me to have sex.

_And that's how it began…_

"It went on like this for a while. Drugs, sex, drugs…you get the idea. Then Max introduced me to his friends, and I began to sleep with them for drugs too. They also threw in money so I could feed myself. After a while, Max took me to clubs and made deals with other guys. If the guys paid enough, they could have sex with me. Max got some percentage of the money, and I got the rest.

"One night, I woke up, realizing I must have been so high on the drugs that I didn't tell those guys I had AIDS. I quit the heroin and sobered up enough to talk to Max. He wasn't worried because he already had the virus. He said those guys were taking their chances and made their own choices. He didn't care about my concern about infecting others—until I threatened to leave. He…he hit me…and told me to never mention it again. I give the guys a warning anyway, unless I feel like the guy is so much of a dick that he deserves to be sick." My mouth dropped open. "Oh, please Roger. You know how some of these guys are—they are assholes and we both know it.

"Anyways, it's worked out okay for me. It was hard at first, but I've learned to deal with it. Max tries to take care of me. I also get a lot of nice attention from the guys. I know that I'm beautiful—Max has helped me see that. I can have whomever I want. And I make way more than I did as a stripper."

This was quite a story. Unfortunately, looking into her eyes, I knew it was all true. This didn't sound like Mimi at all, but what did I know? I went to Santa Fe for a month or two and left her in this mess. Another thought struck me though. "But what about getting pregnant?"

She held out her purse. There were at least a couple dozen condoms in there. "No worries."

"Mimi…" I didn't know what to say.

Mimi had become a prostitute.


	5. Chapter 5 I Promise To Find a Way

"Mimi," I said after taking a couple more shots of vodka, "this really isn't like you. Why are you selling your body like this?"

Mimi shrugged her shoulders. "It's not that different than being a stripper. And besides, this is the only life I know."

"It doesn't have to be," I replied. "Mimi—you can do so much better than this. I know you can."

Mimi set her glass down on the bar. "No I can't, Roger. You and I know once you've crossed the line, you can't go back. You left me little choice, Roger. I wanted to be with you, and you left!" she cried hysterically. "This is what I'm good at. This is all I know! You and I both know this is no fairy tale. This is life. I can't just leave this life. It's like before—there is too much baggage. Life doesn't come without strings attached."

I felt immensely guilty. I looked around the café, and then brought my attention back to Mimi. "Are you in love with this Max?"

She shook her head. "No, love has nothing to do with it. Love is nothing. I am Max's property now."

"You are your own person, Mimi. No one controls you. You are you!" She stared at me. I had a thought—"What if Angel saw you today?"

Mimi dropped her jaw. "That's low, Roger…" A tear trickled down her face. "I…I dunno…I…" She started really crying. Setting down my glass, I put my arm around her. She buried her face into my leather jacket. I had to admit, it was nice to have her so close again.

"I…I'm sorry Mimi. I just don't like seeing you like this," I admitted.

Sniffing, she raised her head up. "You still care about me...that song…"

"Yes, it was written for you," I answered.

"Why?"

I looked into her eyes. "You know why—because I love you. I wrote it when I was traveling from Santa Fe."

She looked surprised at this piece of information. She looked up at the clock over the bar. Sighing, she said, "I have to go soon."

"Why?"

She rolled her eyes. "Max. If I am not back at his place by one o'clock, I had better be making money somewhere."

"I'll pay you," I joked. She raised her eyebrow. "I want you to come home, home with me," I begged.

"I can't. He'll find me...he's got a lot of friends and people. When he does find me, I don't want to get anyone hurt." She pulled out some cash and dropped it on the counter. Putting the rest of her money back in her purse (she was pretty loaded), Mimi looked up at me. "Say hi to the others for me, okay?"

"I will," I promised.

Mimi smiled a little, and then turned around and walked out of the Life Café.

_I'll set you free, Mimi._

_I don't know how,_

_And I don't know when,_

_But I know one day_

_We'll be in each other's arms again._

"She's in really deep, guys. We have to help her."

I was back in the apartment, trying to convince Collins and mark to help me free Mimi.

"I'm just glad she's alive," remarked Collins. "Any idea why she didn't tell us?"

I thought about it for a moment. "She was probably ashamed of it. I even asked her what Angel would think…that got her really depressed."

Mark sighed. "Max sounds like a difficult character though. He pimps out Mimi and deals drugs—who knows what else he is capable of? Even Mimi is afraid to run away."

Collins argued, "But it's not right. We can't let her keep doing this to herself. First drugs, then prostitution…what else is next? If we don't help Mimi, the situation will only get worse."

I hadn't even thought about that. Collins was right, though, and it scared me.

Me. Roger Davis. Was scared.

Yeah, it was bad.

I was standing on the roof, with only my guitar.

_525,600 minutes_

_525000 moments so dear_

_525,600 minutes_

_How do you measure, measure a year?_

_By the tears I've shed_

_When I think of you_

_By the reasons I will_

_Continue to love you_

_I swear this, with ev'ry_

_Beat of my heart_

_I will find a way to_

_Give us a new start._


	6. Chapter 6 Below 14th Street

They said she had the best ass below 14th street. Was it true?

I knew how to find out.

It was Friday night. I decided to go to the most likely place where Mimi would be working. I could confront her, check out the place, and figure out a way to get her out without too much trouble.

Ciclo Night Club was just south of 14th street. It seemed like one of the more likely places that Max would do his business. Drug deals and prostitutes had plagued the area for a long time. I also knew that if Max was here, then Mimi would have to be nearby—if he was as possessive as she said he was. I would have to be careful when approaching her, and make it seem like I was interested in more than just talking.

So there I was, standing outside a small but very loud club. There was already a long line to get in, and it was only seven o'clock. I didn't exactly carry enough cash to even think about bribing the guys at the door.

It didn't matter, though. My luck came through; Mimi was standing at the corner of the building, leaning against the wall. She was either talking to Max or a potential customer. Not caring which one it was, I walked straight to her. They were so engrossed in conversation that they did not notice me walking towards them, and in this way, I heard what they were saying.

"So what they say—is it true?" the guy asked.

"Why don't you find out for yourself?" suggested Mimi.

The guy looked her over. "Mmmhm…how much is it going to cost me?"

Mimi smirked. "If you're good to me…say…fifty dollars?"

"Ouch," the guy remarked, running his hand through his dark hair. "That's a lot."

"Hey, a girl's gotta make a living somehow. And besides, it's better than the girls on the next street. They charge much more."

I cleared my throat. The two of them turned their heads to face me. Mimi looked surprised to see me there, while the guy looked angry. "Who the hell are you?" he demanded.

I responded, "The next customer, if you aren't buying in." Mimi looked at me strangely. I was going to have to explain myself when we were alone again.

"I never said I wasn't buying in. Just said it was expensive," the guy said gruffly. "She was mine first."

I chuckled in spite of myself. "You are mistaken, my friend. Mimi and I have a long-term business relationship. I'm a regular."

"Oh, really?" he asked. "Tell me, does she really have the best ass below 14th street?"

"It's true."

"Hmm." The guy thought for a minute. He looked at Mimi's backside and then at me. "I'll fight you for her."

"Fight? I'd hate to kick your ass," I spat out.

Mimi looked a little frightened. "Boys…" she warned. "Please don't do this."

I reached in my pocket and pulled out a wad of cash. "Look, I've got the money. Apparently you can't afford her, so just move on."

The guy stared at the money, and then tried to make a grab for it. I pulled it out of his reach, and he fell on the ground. He had obviously very little balance or he was drunk. Either way, I stepped over him grabbed Mimi by the hand, and together we ran down the street. We stopped behind a liquor store.

Mimi looked behind us, then at me. "You should really be more careful about who you piss off." Taking a deep breath, she then asked, "What are you doing here anyway? Do you seriously want to sleep with me?"

I shook my head. "No, but I wanted to talk with you, to see you. I'll pay you for it—but I don't want to pay for sex. Just a date."

Mimi raised her eyebrows. "That could be expensive. You look like you might have plenty of cash, though."

"Meh, most of that wad was one dollar bills." She laughed. It was good to hear her laugh, even at my expense. "Seriously. It's all tips from the café."

She smiled and shook her head. "So what exactly do you want to do?"

"Wow, Roger. This is beautiful," Mimi whispered.

We were standing in the park, gazing at the pond as the swans swam across the moonlit surface.

I was never good at this romance thing, but it was worth a shot. "_Not as beautiful as you, Mimi_," I sang.

She giggled. "_Oh, really? What about the moon? _

_Do you see the stars above?_

_Is it still too soon_

_To completely fall in love?"_

I replied, "_It's never too soon, but it can be too late,_

_For what we have here is pure fate."_

Dancing in circles, my Mimi sang back. "_Oh, my mighty Shakespeare,_

_Won't you be my poet, my song?_"

"_To be anything else_

_Would be completely wrong._"

I could almost hear the music in my ears as she walked up to me. "_There's only us,_

_There's only this._

_I know regret, _

_But all I want is bliss._

_This is my fate, _

_The life I know, _

_And all I can do_

_Is pray that you will go_

_Before I hurt you anymore…_

_Before I hurt you anymore…_" Tears glistened in her eyes.

I put my hand on her face. "_You cannot hurt me, I am behind the wall._

_Only you can make my borders fall._"

She looked into my eyes, and in one isolating gaze, I could see what the past months had done to her heart. In that one moment, we both knew the other was suffering—and we kissed. It was a kiss more passionate than before. We drank in each other as if we had never kissed before, savoring every sweet moment we could.

Too soon, the kiss broke. Mimi smiled at me. "I still love you, Roger."

My heart was bubbling in ecstasy. "And I love you, Mimi."

"_I should tell you_," she sang.

"_I should tell you_," I repeated.

"_I should tell you about these days,_

_About how it's been one big haze—_

_Living life with an empty heart, _

_Giving myself away part by part._

_I should tell you…_" she whispered.

"_And I should tell you_

_How I've missed your face,_

_About those memories_

_That I can't erase—_

_About how your eyes_

_Kept me sane_

_Through these months_

_Without hearing your name_," I told Mimi.

"It's been hard," she admitted. "I've missed you so much." She hugged me tight.


	7. Chapter 7 The Fight

We were holding hands as we walked down the street. "I want to come, Roger. I really do. Just not now," Mimi told me.

I grimaced, but I understood to an extent. Once you get stuck in a rut like this, it's very hard to get back out. Been there, done that. I wanted to help her so much, though…

While I was lost in my thoughts, I was unaware of our surroundings and did not notice a tall man coming from our left. Mimi's hand shook and I looked where she was looking. Seeing the man, I knew it had to be Max. He was about my height, but he had a lot more muscle (I should really work out more often). "Hey there," he shouted. "Did you enjoy her?"

Oh. He assumed I slept with her. I took one glance at her—she squeezed my hand—and I replied, "Yeah, she was fantastic."

"Good. I'd like to have her back now," he ordered. "Unless you have enough to for the whole night."

The last thing I wanted to do was to give Mimi back to Max, but she looked at me with pleading eyes, trying to convince me to avoid a disagreement. I sighed. "Fine," I resigned her over. Mimi glided to Max's side. He looked satisfied and put an arm around her waist. I felt rather dejected, and began walking home. I had no more gone down the road when the yelling began.

"You filthy whore! You've slept with every man on the street, and you don't want to sleep with me?" Worried about Mimi's safety, I ran back to Max and her. He continued to yell. "What do you mean you don't feel like it? Damnit, you are mine and mine alone! Remember that! Who got you where you are today? If not for me, you'd probably be dead!"

As they came into my view, I saw Max violently hitting Mimi. He punched her and slammed her against the wall. I ran harder, full speed, and knocked Max off of Mimi. "Hey, back off!" he shouted. "She's not yours."

"She's not yours either," I replied angrily. I then speared Max and pushed him to the ground. I got a few good punches in before I felt someone pulling me off of him. Next thing I knew, about four or five guys were all beating the crap out of me. There were too many—I didn't have a chance.

When they were satisfied (and I had lost a tooth or two), Max came over to me and threatened, "If I ever see you on this street again, I'm going to kill you. Capiche?" He punched me one more time and then stalked off with his gang and Mimi. "You're going to pay for this, Mimi dear. I'm afraid it's going to be a long and hard night for you," I heard him mutter.

Great. I had tried to save her from her trouble and got her more into trouble. Figures.

I limped my way down the street, praying Mimi was going to be okay, and hoping the pain in my ribs wasn't a broken bone.

_I walk alone_

_Down this street,_

_Fighting the pain_

_Of my defeat._

_No matter what,_

_I will keep on,_

_Because I can't live_

_With you still gone._


	8. Chapter 8 I'm Such a Tough Guy,Aren't I?

"Roger, what the hell? What happened?" a concerned Mark demanded. I stumbled through the front door (if you can even call it that) and headed for our little couch. Mark got up from his seat and helped me to sit down. "Hang on a sec, I'll get you some ice."

Such a good friend.

I moaned in pain. I almost wanted to cry, but I wanted to keep some of my dignity. "I was with Mimi..." I tried to explain.

"She did this? Damn," replied Mark, bringing over a cloth with ice in it.

I whispered thanks and put it on my left eye. "I got to see her," I choked out. "We...we were together...again...like old times...then Max...tried to take her back...and I didnt want to let her go to that monster."

Mark shook his head. "You should really choose your fights carefully, Roger."

"Have I ever?" I chuckled softly.

"No, not really."

I sighed (then cringed because my ribs were sore). I wanted to save her. I wanted to save her and take her away...we would go someone, away from all this hell, away from the dark streets and sneaky glances. There must be a place for us somewhere in the world, somewhere we could be ourselves and do the things we love the most. We could forget our past, live every day like it's the last...

Mark interrupted my thoughts. "I know that it's hard. I don't like it any more than you do. But I'm with you on this. Next time you go to see her, you won't be alone."

"Thanks, man."

Mark nodded, seeming to understand my situation. That was the great thing about Mark; he didn't suffer like the rest of us from AIDS or from drug addictions, but he was always understanding, like he could feel our pain, know our exact feelings. He had a cynical view of the world, and believed our suffering was nothing to be ashamed about In this he spent his life's goal pursuing a better life for the less fortunate.

I wished I could be like that for Mimi--someone who would understand her on any level, and someone who would fight for her honor (and succeed).

It was another Wednesday night at the Life Café. Apparently my song had garnered so much attention that people were beginning to return for another round my excuses for songs.

I wanted to write something that would inspire everyone to imagine a woman—no, a goddess—trapped in a bottle, bursting to be free. Someone who wanted a second chance—to be broken from her cocoon, and free enough to fly wherever she wanted, like Mimi used to be.

I was going to have to think hard on that one. I didn't even consider that, after last week's events, Mimi would show up. Yet, when I was tuning my guitar on stage, there she was—at the bar as usual. There were shadows of bruises, probably from the week before. I could tell they were from that night because my bruises looked about the same now. Max had hammers for hands.

I nodded at her, acknowledging her presence, wishing I could tell her what an inspiration she was to me. I was falling in love with her all over again—despite the shit that went down the week before. I wanted to be with her, to listen to her deepest hopes, her true feelings about me. I wanted to sing with her, to echo in harmony, to ….

"Um, Roge, you ever gonna play?" Josh asked me, interrupting my daydream.

I shook my head to clear the thoughts. "Yeah, let's do it."

From my guitar came the sweet twang of rock and roll music. I played it hard and fast, with Josh and Patrick in tow. They moved their hands and fingers swiftly as we played for the night.

During our break, I walked over to Mimi. She didn't see me coming until I was next to her, and when she did see me, she tried to walk away. I held her arm softly. "Don't," I whispered. "Please."

She looked at me with tears in her big brown eyes. "Roger, I'm so sorry."

"Hey, no, it's cool. Everyone once in a while I need to know that someone can still kick my ass. Keeps me human."

"Roger…"

"Mimi, really. As long as I can still see you, that's all that matters."

"That's just it, Roger. You can't," she replied.

"Why the hell not?"

She took a deep breath. "Max wants to go over to the Pittsburgh area and get some turf there. He says there's not as much competition for…his business…and things."

My heart dropped. "Pittsburgh?"

"It's not because of you," she said quickly. "He's actually been thinking about it for some time. We leave next Wednesday."

I shook my head. "There's no way I can ever say goodbye to you."

Mimi pleaded, "You must, Roger. I don't want to see you get hurt again, okay? I still care about you so much. I wish we could be together, and I wish that things were different, but they're not."

I sighed. "I know." There was much to do in the next week. I'd have to get Collins, Roger…even Benny if I had to. Wish Angel was still around. I'm sure she'd kick ass in her high heels. I smirked inwardly at the thought. I turned my attention back to Mimi, who was now downing another shot of whiskey. "Mimi…are you okay?"

"What do _you_ think, Roger," she snapped. She then turned her head to me and smiled apologetically. "Sorry, it's just been rough, that's all."

"Does Max do any other businesses besides…" I let the question hang.

"Yeah, he has some buddies sell pot on the ends of the street. One guy sells straight-up, powerful heroin."

There was more to this, I could see it in her eyes. "What else, Mimi?"

"He's not the only one, Roger. His brother, Nick, does the same thing, only one street over. They've been arguing over turf for a while. Nick doesn't know about Max moving, but would probably say he's doing it because he's scared of him. Nick only deals in drugs and guns, though—no prostitutes."

That made him okay in my book. Wow, what I was I thinking? Okay? He sells drugs and guns! Well, so long as it didn't involve prostitution, I was sure that he wouldn't touch Mimi. "So there's a rivalry?"

"Yeah, it's been going on for some time. In the few times I've met Nick, he's actually better to the people that work for him than Max is, but Max is sneaky and a pathological liar. He could really be even lying about moving just to screw with Nick. I don't know, though. It's just what he told me."

So they may not move after all. I was really beginning to like the sound of this Nick guy. Maybe there was a way after all. I needed a plan though, and I needed information. I took Mimi's hands into my own. "How exactly does Max run his operation?"


	9. Chapter 9 Plans

Mark, Collins, and I were in a brainstorming session, trying to figure out ways to get to Mimi and get her out safely. Mimi had given a few hints as to our ins and outs, and we figured Collins at least would be able to safely sneak in, since he had similar experiences before.

While in mid-sentence, Mark was interrupted by a knock on our door. He shut his mouth, got up, and slid our door open. Maureen was there. "Hey pooky," she said in her usual hyper tone. "How's my Marky today?"

I resisted the urge to chuckle. Collins smirked. Mark shot us both a look, then turned to Maureen and asked rather irritably, "What do you need, Maureen?"

"Oooh jeez baby, you don't need to be so rude. I was just coming over to ask for some help for my next concert."

"I'm in the middle of planning something else right now, Maureen. I'm sorry, you'll have to find someone else."

Her jaw dropped. Mine did too—Mark never said no to Maureen. I guess he was finally getting over her. She seemed infuriated, though, by his comment. "Mark! What the hell could be more important than my concert?" she demanded.

Mark replied quietly, "Mimi."

She gasped. "You found her?"

"She found me," I answered. "It's a long story…but long story short, she's in trouble and she needs our help."

Maureen stared at me. "How could you find her and not tell me?!" she shouted, stomping her foot.

"We've been busy," I explained.

"Look, Maureen, we don't really have time for your antics. Either you leave, or you help. Your choice," Mark stated.

_Holy shit. Mark grew some balls lately._ That's what I was thinking anyway. He must be really serious about this Mimi thing. Maureen was shocked too; I don't think Mark ever spoke to her that way. She stuttered, "M-m-mark…p-pooky…" She looked ready to cry. Then she shook her head and smiled. "Of course I'll help. Want me to get Joanne too?"

"Sure," he said. "We're going to need all the help we can get. Anyone know Benny's number?"

"Seriously? You're going to call him?" Collins asked.

"Yeah, sure, why not? He needs to know we found Mimi anyway. They were friends, you know."

Boy, did I sure know.

It was a good feeling to have more on our side, though. I was almost excited.

_Soon, I'll be able to see you, Mimi._

******************************************

Mark and I followed Joanne and Collins as they made their way to the bar where Nick was rumored to be at every night. Mimi had said he looked very much like his brother, only a little taller. I just hoped this would all work out like we planned.

If things went right tonight, Joanne and Collins would appear to be a couple, much like Mimi and Max were—Collins was her "pimp" and Joanne worked for him. They would appeal to Nick's dislike of his brother, claiming that he was ruining their business, making up every story possible to make Max sound like the bad guy. Of course, it shouldn't take much to get Nick riled up, and he would be influenced to track down his brother. In return, Collins the "pimp" would give Nick 1/3 of his total profits (which he made up to be very high, using the cash he hacked from the ATM as "proof").

Maureen and Benny weren't with us, as they were part of a different stage of the plan.

I was nervous. Tapping my foot, pacing…I was doing everything to keep myself occupied. It apparently bothered Mark, as he began to speak. "Stop man, you're going to look suspicious if you do that. Whatever happened to that tough guy persona?"

I sighed. "_When you've got someone you love_

_And they're hanging on by a thread_

_Of hope in your heart,_

_Then you begin to dread_

_That moment when you have_

_To face destiny's call._

_Oh, Mark, don't you _

_Even know me at all?_

_Mimi's the world to me,_

_She's the eyes of my heart._

_You can say what you want,_

_But please, don't start._

_I want to free her _

_And take her away from this place._

_I want to see a true smile_

_For the first time on her face._

_If only you knew Mark…_

_If only you knew…_"

"_Well maybe I do_," he replied.

"_Maybe I do._

_You have to remember,_

_I loved and lost too._

_At least you'll have the chance_

_To live your life with her._

_I certainly won't,_

_That's for sure._

_At least you'll love her_

_For the rest of your days. _

_The rest of us will be watching_

_With one isolating gaze."_

That last line sent a shiver down my back. Creepy.

The door to the bar opened, and Collins and Joanne stepped out, with two men with guns behind them.


	10. Chapter 10 What Was That About?

"Oh shit," I whispered. "This can't be good." As I watched the situation unfold, though, it turned out to be a lot different than I expected. Joanne and Collins turned around to face the guys with smiles on their faces. They said something and the guys laughed, and one of them did some sort of fist handshake with Collins. Collins nodded his head, put his arm around Joanne's waist, and walked away as the other two guys turned around and walked back into the bar.

Mark and I headed over to Joanne and Collins. "How did it go?" Mark asked.

Collins laughed. "A lot better than I thought."

"Maybe it helped that you were a bit high before we went in," remarked Joanne. "In any case, we made a deal with our buddy in there."

"Nick's a pretty cool guy," interrupted Collins.

"If you don't count the fact that all of his business transactions are illegal," Joanne pointed out.

"Well of course you would say that, you're a damn lawyer."

"Shut up." She gave him an evil eye. I had a random thought: they would be an interesting couple if Joanne wasn't a lesbian. I held in my laugh.

Mark replied, "So everything's set up?"

Joanne nodded. "Yeah, we're actually moving in on Max pretty soon. Apparently Nick was looking for an opportunity to do something to his brother for a pretty long time. This was very convenient for him."

"Hmm, what happens if he finds out you're not a hooker…?" I wondered.

Mark put a hand on my shoulder. "Let's not let him find out, okay? Look, we have to do this one thing at a time. But I know this for sure: we're going to get Mimi back."

"Yeah, he even mentioned her," said Collins. "Said that she was the reason why Joanne wasn't getting any business."

"Nick said that?"

"Yep." Collins began to dig around his jacket, probably for a joint or something. "He even said he would do the same thing his brother was, but girls aren't worth the trouble."

"Oh, and guns and drugs are?" I asked. "How ironic."

"You're telling me," said Mark. "All right, everything's ready then. When is Nick taking care of his brother?"

"Tuesday," answered Joanne.

I raised my eyebrows. "That's cutting it close. Max and Mimi were supposed to leave Wednesday."

By now Collins had found his stash. He took out a joint and lit it, then shrugged his shoulders. "Hey man, it's the best we can do." He puffed smoke into the empty night air.

"I just hope it's good enough."

"Me too," agreed Mark. "Come on, let's go home. Let Nick do his thing."

******************************************************

Back at our place, Mark and I were sitting in the dark (damnit Benny, get the lights fixed). We were both sitting with our thoughts, until Mark spoke up. "You okay?"

"Yeah. Just worried about Mimi."

"I know. There's only so much we can do."

"Well, I could fight Max again."

"No, I don't think that's a great idea."

I rolled my eyes. "_What do you suggest then,_

_That I forget Mimi again?_

_I've found her,_

_I've almost got her home—_

_There's nothing that's going_

_To keep me alone—_

_I love Mimi with my heart_

_And there's no way I'll let us be apart._"

Mark stood up. "_I know, Mark,_

_But you've told me that before._

_Sorry if I don't believe you._

_One minute you want to forget her name,_

_The next day you just aren't the same._

_I know you love her,_

_But it's a strange thing—_

_That all of a sudden you give a damn_

_And you cling_

_To that last hope in your heart—_

_In our hearts—_

_That we will be like we were before._

_Don't you know how long it's been?_

_Don't you know there's more_

_To this story of our lives?_

Roger, our life is short enough. Don't make it shorter with stupid decisions."

"What the hell, man? I thought you were supporting me on this," I shot back.

"I was just thinking about how you suddenly cared about Mimi all over again. Now we're all risking our necks for her."

"Man, just stop it. If you don't want to help, then don't. But I'm not leaving her behind again."

Mark stared at me. "Fine. I'm already in this, but just be careful." He headed to his room.

I sat there, staring off into space. _What the heck was that all about? I know Mark explained it but it didn't make sense that he would mention this now. Guess he was still jealous that I was getting a girl and he wasn't. No, that wasn't Mark. He wasn't like that._

I turned my head and looked at the door to his room. _What was going on?_


	11. Chapter 11 At the Life Cafe

I was nervous the whole week. I worked, went home, worried, went to work. That was basically my routine—until Tuesday night. I was at the Life Café, busing tables as usual, waiting for Mark or Collins to show up and tell me how things went. Damn the fact I had to work tonight of all nights—I was supposed to be off until I was called in. I continued a diatribe of curses in my head the entire night, until the last person I expected to see walked in.

It was her. Not only was Mimi there, but behind her was Max, with a huge smile across his face.

_Oh shit._ I fought the urge to run.

Then I realized, they weren't here for me. Apparently Max was trying to be a gentleman and take Mimi out. He even looked straight at me, but didn't recognize me—I suppose because of the recent haircut and the work uniform. I secretly thanked a higher power for this fact, and tried to avoid the table for the rest of the night. Mimi even knew better than to call out to me.

I looked at the clock—six o'clock. From what I gathered from Collins, Nick was going to stalk Max down and take him out when he least expected it. Glancing over at Max's table, I thought—_I bet he doesn't expect it now_.

That was the last thing I needed, especially if Max chose to recognize me. He would just know I was involved. Then, of course, I would potentially have two angry men ready to kill me—Nick for using him as a tool, and Max for trying to get to Mimi again.

I saw Mark come in and take a seat at the bar. I carried some dishes over to the bar area, and began to suddenly clean the area to steal a word with Mark. "Hey man," I said, walking up.

"Hey there. Soon. Very soon."

"He's here," I hissed.

"Who?" Mark asked.

"Him." I nodded towards Max.

Mark looked briefly in the direction I indicated. "Oh shit." He did a double take. "Wow, that really is Mimi."

"Yeah, it is," I said. It was hard not to look at her because she was still so beautiful. I had to, though, in order to avoid Max and another confrontation. I really didn't want to lose the only job I had—or Mimi for that matter.

Mark cleared his throat. "I think we're going to have some problems then."

"Like what?" I inquired, gathering that last of the glasses.

Mark leaned over to me and said quietly, "Nick said he knew Max was going out to eat tonight, and he knew where, and he was going to take him by surprise there."

Great. "I knew it. Just perfect."

"Well, if things go bad, then grab Mimi and I'll be right there with you," Mark said. "Is there a payphone here? I'd like to call up Collins and get some back up here."

"That would be great. Payphone's over there." I pointed it out as I balanced the pile of dishes in my arms. "Sorry, gotta go."

"It's ok. Do your job." Mark smiled, and then turned around to ask the bartender for a drink.

I went off to the kitchen and returned to Mark. "Got ahold of Collins?"

"Yep, and Maureen and Joanne too."

"But I thought you didn't want everyone hurt or involved."

"For emotional support. Some sort of girl thing."

"Ah. Okay. Keep me posted."

"Sure thing."

I ran off to take care of more booths, keeping a keen eye on Max's table. Hopefully this didn't go as bad as I thought it might.


	12. Chapter 12 Confrontation

**A/N: Promised another chapter to make up for lost time. Of course, confrontation time. You all know what this means!**

**Random note: Inspiration by "45" by Shinedown.**

*********************************************

I can be absolutely amazed every night at how some people leave their tables. It's not much to just pile them up for me, is it? Or to at least let me know you spilled something in your seat? Ugh.

Sorry, just a rant.

But this was what I was thinking about when Nick showed up. I knew it was him from the signal Collins gave me from the corner. Nick was the exact height that Max was, but slightly bulkier, with darker hair. He looked like the kind of guy we needed to take out someone. I vaguely wondered if he did this professionally.

While I was drifting in my thoughts, Patrick, my co-worker and fellow band-player, nudged me and said, "Hey man, Gavin wants those dishes now."

"Yeah," I said absentmindedly. "He'll get them."

"Hey, you okay?"

I glanced over at Mimi and Max's table. "I'll let you know." I ran off to the kitchen with the dishes. Gavin gave me a nasty glance for my tardiness, but he was the least of my worries. I returned to the dining room just in time to see Nick pull out a .45 and aim it for Max's head, saying some things I couldn't quite hear, for by this time, there were a few panicked people screaming.

I shot a look to Mark, and he nodded as a signal. I knew: as soon as it was over, we would be able to get Mimi. I was almost excited—but killing Max? I felt slightly guilty.

_He deserves it. He's a rapist, among other horrible things._

_But death? Life is so short._

_You know what trouble this man brings._

_Mark will cover this in his Buzzline report._

_Shut up!_ I cried to my head. Last thing I needed was all this panic in my own head. Cooks from the kitchen ran out to see what was causing the chaos and stopped right behind me.

The whole room seemed to be in limbo. On the one hand, people seemed to be running out like chickens with their heads cut off, and on the other, those who worked at the restaurant were as still as statues, just waiting for…something…to happen.

Blurry and still, all at the same time. It was the perfect chaos. Heh, Mark would like that thought.

Absolute madness.

Nick laughed harshly, then pulled the trigger, killing the man that ruined the life of the woman I love.


	13. Chapter 13 Escape

**A/N: Sorry I know, I hate A/Ns too, but I apologize for a short chapter last time. I felt like that whole situation deserved its own chapter, and hope to wrap things up pretty soon.**

***********************************************

I had never seen so much blood in my entire life. Mimi was definitely freaked out, seeing as how most of Max's brain ended up in her lap. Definitely disgusting in my book.

Nick turned to Collins, apparently noticing him standing in the corner. "Better pay up. I'd like a little of what you've got now."

Collins looked stunned, then composed himself. "You said not 'til next Thursday, man."

"I want that money now!"

I smelled the trouble was brewing. I tried to make my way over to Mimi without attracting Nick's attention. Mark noticed, and engaged Nick in conversation in order to keep distracting him. "Hey man, he said he'll give it to you later."

Nick turned red. "I just killed my own damn brother. I want the money! You promised that Jo here made a lot every night."

I could have sworn Collins said something about being really stoned that night. He then spoke up, "Hey, tomorrow, then. Your place?"

Nick held up the gun to his head. "Maybe. Why don't you let Jo bring it to me? If not, I'll blow her head off too."

Mimi saw me now, and mouthed, You?

I nodded. Come with me.

She looked at me strangely, then looked at Nick. She slowly slid out of her seat and walked over to me. I held her hand and headed towards a back exit for the cooks.

"Hey man, that's not necessary," said a scared Collins. "Dude, I'll bring it, okay?"

"Better. And it better damn well be the amount we discussed." He brought the gun down. "And if you don't you bring it, I will find you. 'Cause you know what? All the people that worked for my brother work for me now. We will find you," Nick threatened. He stormed out of the café.

Mimi and I made it through the kitchen and outside. "What the heck is going on, Roger? Did you have something to do with this?" Mimi confronted me.

"Yes and no. I'll explain later, love."

"No," she demanded. "I want an explanation now."

Mark, Maureen, Joanne, and Collins met us outside. "Wow, that was scary," remarked Maureen.

"That guy meant business. We may need to get you out of the city," Joanne stated.

Mark asked, "What about the police? They'll think Collins is an accessory."

"Forget that, they'll all think we're accessories," said a panicked Maureen. "I mean, we were all there and everything."

"That, and now Nick is more powerful than before."

Mimi held up her hands. "Whoa, people! Will you tell me what's going on?"

Mark looked at me. "Yeah, you can explain."

I sighed. "Please, let's just go back to the apartment first."

Mimi glared at me, but resigned to that suggestion.

"Hey, Mimi, it's good to see you," said Maureen helpfully.

Mimi smiled. "You too."

**********************************************************

I almost couldn't believe it. We were all in the apartment—all of us. Even Benny had made it over for the occasion. After the sharing of the story, we had one very shocked Mimi Marquez sitting on the couch with her jaw open. "You did all this…for me? But you had a man killed!"

"Well," Collins said slowly, "I really didn't think he'd be killed. I just thought he'd put him in the hospital or something."

"But Max is now dead!"

"And you are now free," I pointed out. "Isn't that better?"

"You don't understand Roger. I'm not ungrateful, but these are certainly some drastic measures."

"Mimi, we didn't realize it would be like this," I said.

She looked at me with tears in her eyes (ouch that was painful to see). "Roger…I…" She sniffed. "How can I be with someone who is okay with zero accountability? You let someone die!"

"Well, it's not like I could very well take the bullet for him. I was on the other side of the room."

"You could have done something!"

"Mimi, he was just trying to help," Mark added. "You should have seen him the first night he knew you were still alive. He still loves you—he hasn't stopped caring or worrying about you."

I was a bit surprised by this, coming from Mark and all, especially considering what he said to me the other night. I looked back at Mimi—and all it took was that one isolating gaze. She hated me for what I had done. And everyone around me could tell too. Benny put an arm around her shoulder. "Hey, Mimi, we're just glad to have you safe. They all risked their necks to save you—and the rest of us are going to risk our necks to keep you all safe."

"Got a plan?" asked Maureen.

"Sure, it's simple. Send you to the opposite side of the country. All of you."

"Zoom in on my empty wallet," I remarked. I had spent all of our money trying to pay for that damn light bill. I had saved a little to buy something special for Mimi, but that was for later.

"I'll pay," Benny offered. "Just tell me the place."

Oh, I already knew the place. "Santa Fe."


	14. Chapter 14 Santa Fe

"Santa Fe?" Benny repeated.

Joanne's face lit up. "That's perfect! Practically on the other side of the world….or at least halfway across the country."

"Santa Fe? Why Santa Fe?" Benny kept asking.

"That's where I went…when…oh never mind, trust me, it's beautiful. And it's far enough away for us to live happy."

Collins piped up, "Can we open a restaurant?"

I grinned. "Sure, man, whatever you want."

"Awesome." He went back to smoking his joint.

Mimi looked down. I took her hands in mine. "Hey, we could start a new life together. You and me—and of course, all these crazy people. What do you say, Mimi? Please?"

She turned her eyes, those beautiful eyes to me. "On one condition."

"Anything." So close…

"Will you sing to me every day?"

"Absolutely." I leaned over and we shared a kiss.

"That's more like it," said a satisfied Mark.

"Hear, hear," muttered a stoned Collins.

Maureen asked, "Hey, I'm going too, right? You could set up your business in New Mexico, right Pookie?" She nuzzled Joanne.

"We're all going," said Joanne matter-of-factly.

***********************************************************

Months later, we were all enjoying a night of closing up the restaurant—Mimi, Maureen, Mark, Collins, and me were fooling around, cleaning, jamming to the music. It was a Sunday night—we had closed at 6 o'clock and were ready to go home.

"Hey there, everybody, I've got some great news!" Joanne announced, entering Angel's Bistro (our name for the restaurant).

"What's up?" Mimi asked.

Joanne held up a newspaper. "Nick—he was arrested. Nothing leads back to us—in fact, our testimony helped the police enough to leave us alone. They've been trying to get him for something for years."

"Woo hoo!" we all cheered.

"Does this mean we're moving back to New York?" Maureen asked.

"You can go, but I'm staying my ass in Santa Fe, baby!" Collins exclaimed.

We laughed. "Hey Roger," Mimi said.

"What's up?" I asked, holding her hand. These past few months with her had been absolutely amazing. I even managed to buy a diamond ring—which was sitting in my pocket for the right moment.

"_Will you take me out tonight_?" she sang.

Hmm…maybe I would ask her tonight.

**********************************

**A/N: You know what to do. Read & Review!**

**Oh yeah, and the End! :D**


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